


Cursed

by Huntress79



Category: White Collar
Genre: Bodyswap, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-06
Updated: 2015-10-06
Packaged: 2018-04-25 05:04:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4947784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Huntress79/pseuds/Huntress79
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Normally, Neal Caffrey was a patient man – but this time, he’s so ready to murder someone. Namely Peter Burke. Or: Learning the hard way that one always should follow their own advices.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cursed

**Author's Note:**

> Fills the “bodyswap” square on my Trope Bingo Card. Based, once again, on the terrific artwork by kanarek13. Set in no specific season. Pairing: N/P/E. Be aware of some sexy times. Guest appearance by Sam and Dean Winchester from “Supernatural”. To clarify things: Neal and Peter swap personalities - Peter is in Neal's body and vice versa.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[ ](http://ic.pics.livejournal.com/sandy79/26529227/34000/34000_original.jpg)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Somewhere, in one of the dark corners of his soul, Neal knew that, rather sooner than later, they were bound to fall ʻvictim’ to something like that. And a small voice inside his head used to say that most likely he was responsible, which was something he could live with. But definitely not with… that.

Like with most things, it all started quite unusual. They were investigating a case of breaking and entering in a mansion only a few blocks away from June’s place. Neal, worried that the woman he came to see as a second mother (or third in his case) was the next victim, threw himself into the investigation. Pretty soon, they had a lead, which brought them to the possible hideout of the thief, a warehouse loft. And if he had known what he knew now, Neal would have done everything to keep Peter out of the loft. It might have saved him and a whole bunch of other people a lot of nerves (and his dignity).

As expected, the suspect was gone when they entered the loft together with Diana and Clinton. After taking a first look around the whole apartment, each one of them felt like they were right in the middle of a museum. Ancient Egyptian vases were standing next to sculptures from Rodin or Henry Moore; genuine paintings from Dali, Degas and Raphael were hanging on the walls. Both Peter and Neal felt somewhat ecstatic, though for different reasons. While Peter suspected that pretty much everything, apart from the furniture, was stolen, Neal just enjoyed the arts on display for what they were – beautiful things, nicely presented in a beautiful setting.

And so it came that he didn’t notice it at first that Peter was heading over to the, surprisingly, open vault. When Neal finally caught up with him, it was too late. Peter already had taken an amulet from a showcase, causing it starting to glow.

“Peter! Put it back! Now!”

Neal had a bad feeling. Artifacts, no matter how old they were, didn’t start to glow just for fun. Something was afoot, and he didn’t even want to know what it was. But Peter, by times as stubborn as Neal could be, didn’t follow Neal’s advice, and so, both of them were engulfed in the strange, blueish-green light coming from the amulet, rendering the two of them unconscious.

Clinton and Diana saw the light coming from the vault, but before they could do anything, they had to shield their eyes from the blinding light that suddenly was there. When they recovered and turned back to their friends, everything seemed normal. Well, until Peter began to come around.

“Diana, Jones. What the hell just happened right now?”

The two “Demi-Suits” exchanged a look. Apparently, Peter hadn’t noticed the difference yet. Before they could point anything out to him, Neal also came around, blinking and feeling as confused as they all were.

“Peter, I swear… Damn it!”

Try as they might, both Diana and Clinton had a hard time to contain the laugh that threatened to come out. It was just a bit too funny to hear these two men speaking with the voice of the other. And Diana didn’t know that Neal could swear at all. But that probably was already a side effect of whatever the amulet (which was still in Peter’s hand) had done to them.

“Neal, since when… oh, crap!”

Finally, Peter’s brain seemed to have caught up with reality. Both men scrambled to their feet and once again, Clinton and Diana felt like in a live reenactment of a silent movie. Neal and Peter first looked down their own bodies, then gave the other a once-over before collapsing in two of the various reading chairs in the loft and burying their heads in the hands.

“We are so screwed”, Peter’s voice exclaimed.

“No shit, Sherlock,” Neal’s voice returned, causing all the others looking at Peter’s body in surprise.

“What?” None of them answered him verbally. “Just because I’m a debonair, suave conman 24/7 doesn’t mean I don’t know how to survive on the streets too.”

If not his (or better Peter’s) body language was speaking for him, this sentence alone, and the way how he said it, was a dead giveaway to everyone that Neal Caffrey was absolutely not happy about the situation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After some minutes, Diana took control of the situation (and subsequently of the whole investigation). Peter was okay with that, a phone call to Hughes backed him up, though they didn’t give any details away. The quartet decided to get to the bottom of this mystery first before letting anyone know about anything.

Clinton offered Peter and Neal to drive them to their respective homes, but Neal refused to go to June’s, and so they both ended up at Casa Burke. Jones had barely left when Neal unleashed his anger.

“How many times have you told me not to touch anything? Huh? And now you go and do exactly that! If I had done it, you already would have slapped some handcuffs on me, and I would be on my way to one of the holding cells at HQ.”

A small whimper coming from the kitchen caused Neal to stop his rant. Satchmo was lying on the floor, confusion clearly written over his face. Why was the pretty master talking with the voice of the chief master?

“Neal, I’m sorry. And just so you know, I’m not exactly happy about it either.” Satchmo saw Neal’s body heaving a sigh. “And you’re right. I would have arrested you if you had done it.” Both men finally sat down at the couch. Some time went by before any of them said anything.

“So, any ideas on how to get out of this conundrum?” Peter’s voice asked.

“Only one,” Neal’s voice answered. “We need Mozzie. ASAP.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Said man already got an update on the situation. Diana, not knowing what she was dealing with, called him over to the loft. Once he was there, he practically made a beeline for the vault.

“Holy Elvis Costello!” He bent down to where Peter had dropped the amulet, put some gloves on and picked it up. “Please don’t tell me that one of them had it in their hands.”

“Hate to tell you that, Mozzie, but yes, Peter had it,” Diana said, her voiced laced with anger, worry and confusion.

“Oh my, my.” Mozzie grabbed an evidence bag from a nearby crime scene kit, putting the amulet inside.

“What should that mean?” Apparently, Mozzie knew something more about the amulet, and Diana was going to get that piece of information out of the short man, one way or another.

“I have no idea, but…,” he turned around to grab the small scroll still lying in the showcase, “…usually, a scroll and an amulet, both covered in strange symbols, doesn’t mean anything good.”

“And?”

“And the bodyswap doesn’t have to be the end.” Diana’s eyes urged him to continue. “As I said, I have no idea what this amulet is able to do, but we could face anything from a short-time curse to a life-long version of it, or in the worst case, a curse with a fatal ending.”

Diana’s face first showed shock before it softened.

“Mozzie, any idea on how we can reverse whatever the amulet did to them?”

“No,” he held up a hand to stop her from asking, “but I know who might help us.”

“Who?”

“Sorry, Lady Suit, the less you know about this person, the better. For all parties involved.”

“I get it: this person is just as shady as you are. Right?”

Mozzie only shrugged. If she was honest, Diana couldn’t care less about this person. As long as they were able to help them getting Peter and Neal back to normal, she wouldn’t ask any questions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back at Casa Burke, the two men were still sitting on the sofa, both lost in their own (?) thoughts. Satchmo was guarding them, but somehow he opted for doing it from afar, from his position near the dinner table to be exactly.

That was how Elizabeth Burke found them when she came home.

“Hey, hon, Neal.” The two men exchanged a look, which didn’t get lost to her. “Okay, one of you, spill it. What has happened?”

She went over to the kitchen area, grabbed a bottle of mineral water from the fridge and headed back to the living room, sitting down in one of the chairs opposite the couch.

Neither Neal nor Peter knew how to explain the situation. Both men knew for sure that Elizabeth was one of the most patient women in the world, but they all were already deep in uncharted waters with this situation that none of them knew how she would react.

“Well, Elizabeth…”

Neal’s voice didn’t get very far. The two words he said were enough for Elizabeth’s eyes to go wide, her expression a mix of confusion and surprise.

“Whoa!!” She looked from Peter to Neal and back before settling on her husband. “Hon, since when is Neal talking with your voice?”

“Since I was so stupid and touched an old artifact during a raid.”

Before any of the two men could add anything (and Neal felt a lot like doing so), Elizabeth began to laugh so hard that her whole body shook. It took her some time to calm down again, and try as they might, neither Neal nor Peter were immune to this contagious laugh.

“What’s so funny?” Neal’s voice dared to ask, a tinge of humor to it.

“You two,” Elizabeth got out between chuckles. “You might not know this, Neal, but ever since you started working for him, Peter was afraid that something like that was about to happen and that probably you were the one to hold responsible for. So…” She had to stop, another round of laughter bubbling out of her.

Neal shook his (new) head, if only to keep himself from joining Elizabeth in laughing. The absurdity that he already knew about it just skyrocketed with El’s information. He hoped that Mozzie was already on their case – otherwise he couldn’t guarantee for anything.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Several years ago, Mozzie would have hightailed out of New York if someone only had mentioned the FBI building downtown. But ever since Neal began working for them, he oh-so-slowly lost part of his fear of anything governmental – which was more due to the people Neal worked with than to their profession. He still saw conspiracies on every edge, but for Neal’s sake, he could keep quiet about most of them.

Sitting in one of the interrogation rooms, Mozzie had both the artifact and the scroll lying in front of him. The FBI lab had deemed them clear, but Mozzie wasn’t so sure about that. Yeah, there might not be a trace of anything on it, but something was wrong with it. Otherwise, it wouldn’t have caused the bodyswap.

Both the inscription on the back of the amulet and the text on the scroll were old – so old that the FBI techs couldn’t find anything relating to it, in any database on the planet. Mozzie expected as much. Not that the FBI techs were that bad, but the strange symbols were a giveaway to that result. Time to call in the cavalry.

Mozzie pulled out a burner phone from his bag, pushed a number and waited. It took three rings for the other person to pick up.

“Winchester.”

“Dean, it’s me, Mozzie.”

“I thought so. How’s the Big Apple?”

“As thrilling and exciting as ever. Listen, Dean, you once said that I should call if I ever come across anything that might fall into your line of work.”

“Yeah, I said that.” Mozzie could hear Dean sitting down, and he was sure that the older of the Winchester brothers was back at their bunker in Kansas. “Okay, what do you got?”

“An amulet, and a scroll, both covered in strange, apparently very old symbols,” Mozzie explained.

“Okay. Any chance to get some pictures to us?”

“Already on their way.” Again, sounds came over the phone, this time sounding a lot like Dean firing up Sam’s laptop.

For some minutes, only static filled the line, interrupted only by the typical sounds of a computer and a printer.

“Okay, Mozzie, to be honest, these symbols doesn’t mean a thing to me. But Sam’s supposed to be back, and we both know that he’s the master of research.” Both men chuckled, having witnessed the younger man in action before. “Has anyone touched it?”

“Yes, and it caused a bodyswap between him and Neal.”

Mozzie could hear Dean groan, probably due to a bit of frustration, which he could so relate to.

“You mean your FBI man has touched it? Typical of them.”

“Yeah, and from what Diana has told me, it’s only noticeable when any of them two starts to talk.”

“Alright, Mozzie, I see what we can dig up.” Dean paused. “One thing, Mozzie – don’t let anyone else touch it!”

“Of course, Dean, you taught me well.”

Seeing Diana approaching his room, Mozzie ended the call before Dean had the chance to say anything else.

“And? Anything new?”

“No, not from me. But I contacted the person I was talking about earlier, and he’s looking into it as we speak.”

“How does he know what we’re dealing with?”

“I sent him some photos,” Mozzie stated matter-of-factly.

“You think that’s enough?”

“It has to.” Diana gave him a look that asked for more. “Let’s just say that my contact is not in the greater New York area. And as much as I resent the government at times, I’m not that stupid that I would break any chain of evidence if I would even try to get it to them.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the meantime, night began to fall on the city, and the three humans at Casa Burke decided that Neal would stay with them until the whole case was solved. Which on the other hand opened a whole new bunch of problems.

First of all, Elizabeth told both men that they only should talk when it was inevitable. She usually was quick on learning and adapting, but something like that needed some time to get used to it. And she reasoned that with them keeping as quiet as possible, it might happen a bit sooner, for both her and Satchmo, who still kept a distance to the men.

Therefore, dinner was a quiet affair, with only Elizabeth filling the men in on the events of her day. Short after, Diana called to give her a short update, but with Mozzie waiting for his contact to call back, they were rooted to the spot in their investigation. Background checks on the thief also brought up nothing, as well as checking the whole area around the loft.

While filling the dishwasher, a thought began to spread in Elizabeth. Ever since she and Peter got married, they had a common fantasy, one for the bedroom only. But they never really got around acting on it. And now, fate was presenting them with a testing ground. With Neal and Peter having swapped their bodies, they could test the waters, so to speak, if a threesome was something for them or not.

Chancing a look at the two men watching the news, Elizabeth tried to come up with a plan on how to approach that topic. She was sure that Neal, no matter which body he was in, probably would jump aboard in a heartbeat. Peter on the other hand was probably a bit harder to convince, but ten years of marriage might have taught her a trick or two.

Grabbing a bottle of beer, two glasses and the rest of the wine, El joined the men in the living room, plopping down between them on the couch.

“So, guys, I have something to talk with both of you.”

Neal and Peter exchanged a look. El said it with so much conviction in her voice that they feared the worst.

“Relax, it’s not as bad as it seems.” She took a sip of her wine and a deep breath. “Short after Peter and I got married, we discovered that we have a common fantasy.” She looked from Peter to Neal, and she saw curiosity on the one and recognition on the other. “We always wanted to do a threesome in bed, but we never got around to fulfill it.”

“So what do you suggest, Elizabeth? That we should seize the opportunity and take a test drive?”

Though it came from the mouth of her husband, Neal’s voice was calm, understanding, and, as usual, full of compassion.

“Yeah. We all might get a bit confused during it, but I’m sure it would work out in the end.”

To her big surprise, she saw both men smiling, and before she could do anything else, ʻNealʼ, sitting on her left, took the wine glass from her hand before capturing her lips in a passionate kiss. ʻPeterʼ, on her other side, followed suit and began to kiss her neck while beginning to open the top buttons on her blouse.

Though she didn’t want to stop, El pulled back from them and got up.

“I think it’s better if we relocate this to the bedroom.”

Before long, they were a tangled mess on the bed, with Neal and Peter doing what they were so famous for – working together like a well-oiled machine, this time intent on driving her crazy in the most delicious way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the meantime, Mozzie was still waiting on Dean to call him. Diana and Jones had organized something like a camp bed for him, and to their surprise, he accepted it without too much protest. He just had fallen asleep when the phone on his desk began to ring.

“Yeah?”

“Moz, it’s Sam. Sorry for calling so late, but this one was a real tough nut to crack. But thank God our resources are not limited to Earth, and so we could solve this mystery.”

“And? What’s the verdict?”

“It’s a pretty harmless amulet. Yeah, it causes a bodyswap, but as far as Cas knows, it probably will not cause any damage to the bodies involved.”

“How long will it last?”

“That’s the only unsure thing about it. Cas thinks about 24 hours, but since the scroll is a bit damaged in that area, he won’t guarantee it.”

“But it will end at some point?”

“Yeah, absolutely, and the two guys should be back to their old selfs.”

“Oh, thank the heavens. Sam, I owe you, both of you. So if you’re around here and need anything…”

“…we let you know, Mozzie.”

Before Mozzie could add anything, Sam Winchester hung up. With a smile on his face, Mozzie dismantled the phone and destroyed the sim card before heading out of the room and looking for either Diana and Jones to tell them the good news.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A new morning dawned on New York, and at DeKalb Avenue, the first rays of sunshine made their way into the bedroom of the Burkes, where Peter, Neal and Elizabeth were fast asleep, their limbs still tangled and all of them sated in more than one way.

Neal was the first to wake up, mostly due to the sun tickling his nose. After shaking off the last remnants of sleep, he chanced a look at the scene in front of him. El was in the middle, a soft smile playing around her lips, which were still swollen from the previous night. Peter was on her left, a soft smile on his face as well, his left arm slung around her waist, his hand grabbing Neal’s right arm. As far as Neal could tell, they all were still naked, and if it was only up to him, they could stay that way a little bit longer.

He got up and went into the bathroom, when his brain finally caught up with reality. He looked up in the mirror, and to his joy, the face looking back at him was his own. Somehow, the curse had worn off during the night, and for probably the first time in his life, Neal wasn’t curious to know how.

 

THE END


End file.
